Spare That House!!

Joshua, son of Nun (Now there's a pedigree), was getting itchy to invade Canaan. He wanted to go down in history as a great warrior. So, he went to the CIA, the Caleb Intelligence Agency, which was named after Joshua's buddy, Caleb. You might recall that Joshua and Caleb were two spies sent by Moses into the promised land, forty years earlier. They and their cohorts came back with those preposterous tales of giants and huge bunches of grapes. Well, like Moses before him, Joshua wanted two spies to go into Canaan, and in particular he wanted them to scout out the city of Jericho to see if there were any weapons of mass destruction.

Like all good agents, they shall remain nameless, and like all good agents, the first place they went was to a prostitute named Rahab. This is known as the origin of the James Bond tradition of involving beatiful women in spy novels. They also operated in what later came to be known as the Pink Panther tradition. For, you see, the king of Jericho found out immediately they were there, and what their purpose was in being there.

The king sent a messenger to Rahab and told her what these two spies were up to. She had not as yet gotten paid for her services, so she lied to the king's emissary and told them that the men had already left and were heading back across the Jordan River. So, the king of Jericho told his secret service to chase after them. Meanwhile, Rahab hid the spies on her roof among some marijuana plants she had drying up there.

After the king's emissary had left, she wanted her money. Well, they told her they didn't have any money, but that they would see to it that her house was spared when Joshua Fit the Battle of Jericho. She asked them, "How will you know to save this house When the Walls Come a Tumbling Down?" They thought for a while and then came up with this brilliant plan. Her house was part of the wall of the city, so they told her, "Hang a scarlet thread from your window. Our soldiers know that scarlet is worn by prostitutes. They know a good thing when they see it, and they will surely spare your house." With that, Rahab gave them a rope so that they could drop from the roof to the ground outside the city wall and escape into the hills.

They returned to Joshua with a full report. They told him there were no weapons of mass destuction. However, their report included the following item: The walls of Jericho are poorly constucted. If you have your people march around the city several times and then blow your trumpets loudly, the walls will Come a Tumblin' Down. However, you might want to save any houses with scarlet threads hanging from the window, if you know what I mean. Wink! Wink!