Look out for the she-bear

It was in the spring of the year just before the series of battles with the Aramites that Nudnik, son of Hairnik was sitting outside his hut near Bethel. Daylight was fading fast when suddenly an arrow whizzed by his face and just missed him.

The next morning he went down the road to the next house to inquire about whom it was that shot the arrow. He saw his friend Newsnik who always seemed to know what was going on. He asked of Newsnik, "Pray tell, who shot the arrow into the air last night?" "You'll never believe this," replied Newsnik," but it was no less than the king of Israel."

"Go on!" replied Nudnik. "Why would he do something like that?" Newsnik rolled his eyes and said, "You know that old geezer, Elisha, who lives next door. It seems he was some sort of prophet, and the king came to find out how to beat up on the Aramites. Elisha told him to shoot an arrow out the East window. When the king obeyed him, he got instructions from Elisha as to how to win the war."

"Well, you think you know everything," replied Nudnik. "Let me tell you something that you don't know about that scary Elisha. When I was just a little boy, Elisha had just inherited Elijah's mantle and his powers. He came down our road one day with the sun shining off his bald head, and a bunch of us kids yelled at him, 'Go home, baldhead! Go home, Baldhead!' Well that old galoot got so mad that he put a curse on us. Suddenly two she-bears came out of the woods. It was awful. Those bears attacked us and mauled me and forty-one of my buddies. Fortunately none of us died, but some of us were beat up pretty badly. See, I still have a big scar on my back."

"Wow!" replied Newsnik, "I sure hope that king doesn't cross Elisha, or he might just put a curse on him, and we'll have nothing but trouble with those miserable Aramites."

Well, my dear readers, if you think things went well, I would suggest you read II Kings 13: 17 - 19, and you will find out just what happened to King Joash when he screwed up in Elisha's eyes. The moral of the story is, don't cross a bald-headed prophet with a smelly old mantle, or you might just have more trouble than you know what to do with.