Boy, this is no Humvee!

The sun was beating down almost unbearably as my camel slowly plodded its way across the Syrian desert. Uncle Abe's camel was kicking up sand and it stung my face as the hot wind blew from from the West. I muttered to myself, "When will we reach this Caanan land?" Before we left Ur, I asked him where we were going. All he would say is "Er, I'm not sure. Yahweh just told me to take my newphew, Lot, and go to a place called, the land of Caanan, wherever that is. He said we should seek our fortunes there." Uncle Abe always calls me "Lot." When I was a boy, he called me, "Not-a-Lot."

Boy, I surely would love to go swimming in the Euphrates River this afternoon. I guess I'll never see that place again. I notice that my wife is also looking back longingly towards Ur. Uncle Abe calls her, "Lot's Wife." She can get a bit salty at times, and I like to keep her happy. Oh well, we're heading West towards Sodom and Gomorrah. I hear they're swinging towns. Maybe she'll like it there.

We had stopped over for a time at Haran. The funniest thing happened there. Sometimes I think Uncle Abe is starting to lose it. "Lot," he says, "Yahweh told me once we settle in Caanan, I will have more descendants than there are sands in the desert." His old lady, Sarai, is in her seventies, and she never had a child. The old goat is also in his seventies. He believes this stuff that Yahweh tells him. Where does he think babies come from? Maybe he thinks the stork brings them. Cheez, what a looney-bin!

I never should have agreed to come along on this trip. However, Uncle Abe is rich, but rather naive. I just might be able to strike a bargain with him for some of the better land when we get to Caanan. Maybe I can convince him to set up camp in the hills, and I can get some good grazing land down in the valley. After all, he likes going up into the mountains to build altars. Who knows what all he sacrifices up there? He gives me the creeps sometimes. I try to get lost when he starts brandishing that big knife.

Do I see mountains off in the distance? "Hey Uncle Abe, why don't you go set up camp up in the hills, while I check out the plains off to the south?" At least I might be able to get off this stinking camel for awhile. Won't that sun ever go down? Tomorrow I'll take my old lady into Sodom. She's been bugging me about going shopping ever since we left Haran.